[Transcriber's note: spelling and grammar oddities have beenpreserved as printed]



BIGFOOT JOE
And Others



Figments of Fancy, Written
Hand-set in Type, &
Printed, by


H BEDFORD-JONES



Done At Lakeport
MCMXX




To The KING

Most Gracious Sovereign,

I beg leave to approach Your Royal Personwith an humble Offering, glean'd from longacquaintance with Your Majesty's subjects.A Work, which owes it's Rise, it's Progress,and Completion to this Source, is hence withall Humility proffered to Your Sacred Majesty.That Providence may long preserve the blessingsof Your Reign to this Profession andNation, is the constant prayer of,

May it please Your Majesty,

Your Majesty's most humble and devoted
Servant and Subject,

H. BEDFORD-JONES

To HUMBUG, Rex et Imperator.




CONTENTS


BIG FOOT JOE

THE CLEAR WORD

THE NAKED MAN

ONE NIGHT AT HEALY'S

THE SHEPHERD'S FAILURE




BIGFOOT JOE


In a town of the north there dwelt threemen apart from their fellows. One of thesemen was a Philosopher, one was a Poet, andone was a Painter. These lived and wrought,while all the folk looked up to them from afaroff. There was a halfbreed called Bigfoot Joewho hewed in a lumber camp, so that the folkknew nothing of him.

The Philosopher penned a mystical workon the philosophy of the woods, and he grewknown in the world. The Poet wrote stanzasfilled with the music of the pines and cedars,and his verse brought high wage. The Painterlimned a single hemlock, instinct with thebreath of the lonely forest; and it found fame.But, deep in the woods, trees crashed downand the unknown lumberjack lopped off theirbranches.

Now it so happened that a certain GreatAuthor, having heard of the famous Three,journeyed across the seas to visit them; for hewas an unwearied seeker after the truth thatis in life.

The Artists, receiving him as a brother,expounded to him the philosophy and rhythmand tonal harmony of Nature; but the GreatAuthor warmed himself in their steam-heatedstudios and said little.

One day the Artists took the distinguishedguest on a visit to the woods. They cameto camp in time to lunch with the jacks, andthe visitor was seated next Bigfoot Joe.Naturally observant, he noted that the halfbreed,coming from the woods bare-headed, flung anexpressive glance at the thick furs of thePhilosopher.

During their meal the Painter apologizedfor the coarse fare—the beans and bread,the creamless coffee; but the halfbreed gorgedhugely, and drank his molasses-sweet coffeewith gusto. The Poet was disgusted by thetable manners of the jacks, for a bread-fightarose amid jests and curses; but the halfbreeddeftly caught a crust and devoured it.

Later, the visitors went to the woods andwatched the work. Presently they came toBigfoot Joe; the others would have passed onbut the Great Author paused and spoke.

"B'jou," replied the halfbreed, wiping hisbrow and staring at th

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