"PST!"
A Proposal
Under Difficulties
A Farce
By
John Kendrick Bangs
Illustrated
Harper & Brothers Publishers
New York and London
1905
Copyright, 1896, by Harper & Brothers.
All rights reserved.
Published September, 1905.
CAST OF CHARACTERS
| Robert Yardsley, | ⎫ | suitors for the hand of |
| ⎬ | ||
| Jack Barlow, | ⎭ | Miss Andrews. |
| Dorothy Andrews, a much-loved young woman. | ||
| Jennie, a housemaid. | ||
| Hicks, a coachman, who does not appear. | ||
A PROPOSAL UNDER DIFFICULTIES
The scene is laid in a fashionable New York drawing-room. Thetime is late in October, and Wednesday afternoon. The curtainrising shows an empty room. A bell rings. After a pause thefront-door is heard opening and closing. Enter Yardsley throughportière at rear of room.
Yardsley. Ah! So far so good; but I wish it were over. I've had thenerve to get as far as the house and into it, but how much further mycourage will carry me I can't say. Confound it! Why is it, I wonder,that men get so rattled when they're head over heels in love, and wantto ask the fair object of their affections[4] to wed? I can't see. Now I'mbrave enough among men. I'm not afraid of anything that walks, exceptDorothy Andrews, and generally I'm not afraid of her. Stopping runawayteams and talking back to impudent policemen have been my delight. I'veeven been courageous enough to submit a poem in person to the editor ofa comic weekly, and yet here this afternoon I'm all of a tremble. Andfor what reason? Just because I've co-come to ask Dorothy Andrews tochange her name to Mrs. Bob Yardsley; as if that were such an unlikelything for her to do. Gad! I'm almost inclined to despise myself.(Surveys himself in the mirror at one end of the room. Then walking upto it and peering intently at his reflection, he continues.) Bah! youcoward! Afraid of a woman—a sweet little woman like[5] Dorothy. You oughtto be ashamed of yourself, Bob Yardsley. She won't hurt you. Brace upand propose like a man—like a real lover who'd go through fire for hers